When I am in conversation with people who have lost loved ones, they often say they feel pressured by well-meaning family and friends to "feel normal" again.
No one should ever be expected to leap over the chasm of grief to the land of feeling normal, right?
Rather, we need time to lean into all of it - the grief and the love - and allow ourselves a safe space to feel all of it.
That thought is helping me now as we wade into this next part of the journey.
I'm feeling ... well, not so normal.
Part lost and part found. Part in a fog and part getting my mojo back. Part grief and part relief.
It's an unfamiliar place. No two days feel quite the same.
But still, there is a harmony about it.
There's a tender alignment in this holy dawn. A simple beauty.
Maybe it makes perfect sense.
We can't go back to the old normal while we are birthing something new.
We need to make space for grace. For rebirth. For renewal.
For a slow ripening.
And that takes time.
A few practices have become my daily bread as I navigate these waters.
I share them here. With love. Great love.
And solidarity for all you are feeling and all you are fielding.
We have been asked to generate a whole lot of patience this year.
And I know, the well is a little dry when it comes to waiting.
But patience can be a friend.
It asks us not to judge something that is unfinished.
To open our hearts in hope toward what we can't yet see.
So if you're not where you want to be - try to love the questions.
Try to partner with uncertainty.
Something deeper is brewing.
So, while we wait a little longer, holding onto hope in our hearts and homes, let’s remember the power of gratitude.
Making a practice of counting your blessings daily has a way of reminding us of how abundant we are - even without the things we think we need.
Especially without the things we think we need.
Gratitude has a way of transforming the most challenging of situations from one of complaint to one of noticing the blessings in the present moment.
It is the fertile soil for growing something beautiful from life’s surprises and lessons.
3: THIS PRAYER
I wrote this as a Guardian Angel prayer a few weeks ago for a post and it's now in daily rotation in my morning practice. I hope it soothes your heart too:
Help me to wake up every morning knowing that I am supported and guided, and that when I listen, I will always know the way.
Remind me that suffering is not in vain. That from ashes come the seeds of transformation and new life. Help me to slow down and make space for uncertainty.
Help me to trust in an outcome that I cannot see. Help me to lift my fears and point me toward a ray of hope. Help me to be grateful even in the unknowing. Remind me that the night is always followed by the light.
4: MORE NATURE, LESS SCREEN TIME
When emotions loom large and the future seem daunting, Nature invites us to be still in her embrace.
For spiritual connection, wellness, strength, wonder and focus—Nature donates her gifts.
With infinite Divine kindness, Nature offers us beauty, health, respite, meditation and solace from our worldly stress.
So leave your phone on the table and take a walk. Or have a cup of tea near a window. Go to a park or a river. And just breathe.
There is no better prescription for the soul.
The inner work of allowing, receiving and listening can't be seen, but is the most important work we will ever do.
Meditation not only helps us to decrease stress and anxiety, but slows down the pace of our thoughts so inspiration can rise up.
It brings us a sense of inner peace, but also a connection with Divine guidance.
It brings us more joy and presence, but also a sense of oneness with all beings.
Now is the time to begin or recharge your practice and find your daily calm.
LET'S NOT BE NORMAL
May you lean into the spectrum of all you have been through - the grief and the love - and allow yourself plenty of guilt-free time to not be normal.
To be where you are. To become who you will become. And be ever so kind to yourself on the way.
With great love and many blessings, xo Mary